"The earthly desires men cherish are shadows. There is no true happiness in fulfilling them. Why, then, do we continue to pursue joys without substance? Because THE PURSUIT ITSELF (author's emphasis) has become our only substitute for joy. Unable to rest in anything we achieve, we determine to forget our discontent in a ceaseless quest for new satisfactions. In this pursuit, desire itself becomes our chief satisfaction. The goods that so disappoint us when they are in our grasp can still stimulate our interest when they elude us in the present or in the past."

Thomas Merton, The Ascent To Truth, p. 21.

The ancient story of Adam and Eve is a story of the fall of humanity into brokenness. The story is not just about brokenness - it is also a story about trying to hide the shame of brokenness.

I believe that the ancient story is more about shame than about guilt. Many people over the years have made the story about guilt. If you read the story carefully (The Bible, Genesis 3), you will not find any references to restoring a fall from grace. You will, however, read a story about a man who is hiding from God and a God who makes clothes to hide their shame - acts which are a counterpoint to their original condition when they were without shame (Genesis 2:25).

This primordial story continues to be dramatized daily in the lives of people around us. People are trying to deal with their shame.

Andrew Comiskey observes: "Shame is the raincoat of the soul, repelling the living water that would otherwise establish us as the beloved of God." The marks of shame are fear and flight. Feeling shame we fear we will be discovered. We fear that those close to us will discover our true selves. Our shame drives us away from meaningful relationships into the aquisition of positions, titles, power, wealth and pseudo-relationships. This flight is often affirmed and supported as we are seen as successful by our peers. Some people unable to find comfort in these outward signs of 'shame-dealing' turn inward and attempt to hide their shame under various addictions including workaholism (this society's acceptable addiction). The degradation of these addictions leads to more shame and self-loathing which reinforces the cycle of shame.

This ancient story opens us to the problem of the 'tear' in the masculine soul. Men around us are looking for ways to deal with their shame. They are crying out for healing.

I will unpack this problem of shame in future blogs.

(c) 2008 Ronald Friesen

"An automatic and serious consequence of a man's failure to be affirmed in his masculine side is that he will suffer from low self-esteem. He will be unable to accept himself. Men who are unable to fully accept themselves lose to one degree or another the power to act as father, husband, and leader. In short, in an at least some part of their personalities they remain immature and become increasingly passive, and unable to creatively to initiate the changes needed to lift themselves and their families out of the inevitable, quagmires of life, The power is within them to do so. The masculine qualities and gifts are there, but they have not been 'affirmed' into life"

Leanne Payne, Crisis In Masculinity, p. 14.